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The Good with the Bad

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We've reached the three year mark.  It's been 3 years since we heard the awful news, 3 years since Matt has started chemo, and 3 years since Myeloma became a regular household topic.  While we've adjusted to planning travel around treatment days, organizing childcare for those early mornings, and figured out dinners for the nights that nausea sets in, there are some things that will just never sit easy. 
It's amazing the friends we have gained and connected with through this process, both old and new.  We've had deeper conversations with perfect strangers than we ever thought possible and connected with people across the country on extraordinary levels, just by a simple phone call.  And up to this point, we've been lucky that we've had a lot of successes to celebrate, both ours and friends.  But this week was a first for us.  This week was the first time, both Matt and I (with separate connections) felt the weight of a true setback.  In a matter of two days we've heard devastating news about the spread of cancer in people we love.  People who have worked so hard to beat this awful disease, and the bastard just keeps coming back.  This is when you realize that cancer really does whatever the hell it wants.  This is when those normal conversations, normal treatment appointments, take on a new feeling.  In a matter of minutes you can go from feeling like we are in complete control of this disease, to feeling utterly and completely out of control.  In the quiet of these past few days I've found myself wondering if and when we will hear that word "setback" in reference to Matt's cancer.  When will it be our turn to feel that weight?  I hope the answer is never, but like I said before, cancer does whatever the hell it wants.  But we will continue to do whatever can be done to beat this thing.  And we are incredibly thankful that there are researchers out there who are working every day to find a cure.  
Up to this point, we are lucky that Matt's cancer has responded well to treatment, and despite a small setback last fall, he is doing well.  But it's moments like these when you just sit back and say "f*%#" 

Matt continues to receive treatment every other week and with the exception of treatment days, he is full of energy.  He is running (really fast, I might add) 3-4 times a week, continuing to eat a perfectly well-balanced (I mean REALLY, REALLY well-balanced) diet and meditating almost daily.  As always, we hope that Matt's numbers will hit 0 once again and he can stop treatments, but for now we remain thankful that everything is stable. 



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